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What Colour is My Wooden Floor?

Was THAT dress black and blue, or was it Ivory and Gold. Is the floor Grey, or is it Brown

I saw ivory and gold, which as far as I’m concerned looked a damn sight nicer than the hideous black and blue that it actually was. And being the son of a French dressmaker, I feel qualified to make comment on this subject, having spent half my childhood and youth with my head buried in ‘Paris Match’ and ‘Vogue’. Although to be honest I learnt nothing much from that experience, other than how to swear in French.

Blue black Dress
Blue black Dress


Blue and black Dress

But the colour of The Dress has caused mass hysteria all over the world, with comments like ‘OMG I thought it was black and blue – I’m calling my bf – I’m scared, what’s goin on babes’. Clearly what’s going on inside this girl’s head is absolutely nothing, and if I were her ‘bf’, I would be looking for a girl with at least a small brain. However, it exposed the designer to mass media coverage, so I doubt she cares what colour it is.


Aged and distressed sample
Aged and distressed sample

Black and blue stripes just says ‘Peruvian wasp’ to me, whereas ivory and gold says ‘Kylie’s backside’. I don’t know why. Perhaps it’s the receptors in my eyes, which are of course is the reason that half the world see black and blue and the other half, the half with taste that is, see ivory and gold.

But this whole fiasco does strike a little chord with me, because not a day goes by in Turgon production when there isn’t a discussion about colour. Okay, less a discussion, more a fight, but that’s usually only in R&D when we’re at the colour matching stage. Then the client gets involved and, occasionally, all hell breaks loose.

Well, now of course we know why. It’s all about the little rods and cones in our eyes, the photoreceptors responsible for our vision at low light levels. That’s why this whole thing surrounding colour can get so messy. If a client sees a floor in our showroom they like, we always ask them to take a piece home so they can see it in their own surroundings. The colour will almost certainly look different under different lights. Does it help? No. Because if a client sees a sample in the showroom, takes it home, then follows it with a visit to production, it can all become horribly confusing. Yet somehow, it all works out in the end.

I saw a picture of Rita Ora at the Oscars a few days ago, where she seemed to be wearing what appeared to be just one side of a set of black tights stretched over her entire body. I couldn’t actually see a dress.

Maybe there is something wrong with my eyesight?


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